XOXO Gossip Girl

Last year I finished college and as a result had a longer than normal summer break, I had a lot of time and not a lot of people I wanted to spend that time with. Thanks to suggestions from people I know (by that I mean tumblr and a couple of people who I know in real life) I started watching lots of American TV shows. As the title of this suggests one of those was gossip girl.

Now I choose not to react to real life situations but create intense relations with characters on TV shows and in films. While gossip girl started out as a bit of fun a few of the characters really made me think twice about the people I have in my life and the way I choose to live it.

In some way I managed to relate to almost every character in one way or another, but most of all Blair, Jenny and Dan. As I got further and further into the show – I am yet to finish it but coursework and exams seem to be all I have time to think about right now – I realised that although individually they may not be the person I desire to be together they have some great characteristics.

 

I went to an all-girls grammar school for 7 years and so there are a lot of comparisons I can make with Blair. From the moment we were accepted everyone seemed to expect us to achieve perfect exam results and if we didn’t we weren’t good enough. It was a very competitive environment and for a long time I felt like if I didn’t do perfectly I may as well give up. This lead too many existential crises and I often felt that I would never get to where I wanted to. I had – and to some extent still have – a strong desire for everything to go the way I wanted it to.

After my first set of college exams which didn’t go as well as I’d hoped I had a similar moment to the one Blair had when she didn’t get into Yale. I had to re-evaluate everything and just felt like completely giving up. Thankfully after a lot of thinking and discussions with my father – who I honestly have no idea what I would do without – I started looking at other universities. I visited Keele University and instantly fell in love I didn’t want to be anywhere else. That’s where I am now studying and honestly enjoying my time here.

Jenny and Dan are both to some extent social outcasts in their school they come from Brooklyn and the Upper East Siders don’t like that although that does change but no spoilers from me. They both change throughout the show Dan more subtly while Jenny is slightly more extreme. She changes through the show in order to have people like her; although at some points she tries to say she’s not changing but everyone can see she has. It’s a feeling I am close to having spent some of my time in secondary school being bullied and trying to change in order to fit in. In my last year I realised I didn’t like the person I had become in order to please others. I became close to a few new people and was happier than ever at being the person I wanted to be with people who liked me for me not who I tried to be.

I guess what I would like people to take away from this is that it’s okay to change a little. Everyone does it just don’t lose yourself to be like other people who honestly aren’t going to be good friends in the long run. Secondly it’s ok to have big dreams and be sad if they don’t work out but never let anything be the end of everything you want. You can still achieve everything you want just try a different path.

Dinah x